THE CHINESE have been making smartphones for big western corporations for years – now they are making their own. Huawei, for example, has opened a 650-staff UK headquarters in Basingstoke, Hampshire, to launch its Ascend P2.
Before long, Wah-way – the phonetic rendering of Huawei – will be rolling off the slavering lips of British gadget addicts as easily as Samsung and tomorrow the marketing push starts with a free event.
Huawei has arranged a Real Life Superheroes (RLSHs) symposium in Bethnal Green to plug Huawei’s Ascend P2 smartphone.
Superheroes? A bunch of fantasists about what Huawei in its very Basingstoke way terms “a range of next generation end-to-end telecoms and IT network solution. Yes, sounds dreadful.
Not necessarily. Huawei’s “people” say the event “is set to transform London’s East End with scientific information, some future gazing and several unique super-powered humans”.
How East London will be transmogrified is not explained, but superheroes? Ah, one will be Phoenix Jones (aka Benjamin Fodor), who will give the history of the RLSH movement and its goal – “to bring justice to those that [who, surely?] would harm others”.
The Guardian describes these “superheroes” as people (all right, young men) “randomly patrolling the night” while wearing interesting clothes.
The connection (groan), you may not be surprised to hear the promoters say, is that the “super-fast, super-slim Huawei Ascend P2 smartphone is quite a ‘super’ hero”. Press here for a seemingly more objective assessment.
As well as the lectures, which start at noon, when Nottingham Trent University’s Dr Morgaine Gaye invites her audience to sample superfoods and what we might one day eat to take us closer to superhuman-hood. So freebies – superfoods and superfood juices – are on the agenda.
As well as the “superhero” phone, superhero merchandise will be on sale. Ooh, fancy clothes!
A cautionary note: a group of MPs is worried by the increasing use of Chinese equipment in British communications networks. Huawei denies direct links with the Chinese government or military, adding that it is owned almost entirely by its employees.
* Huawei Superpowers Symposium, 133-135 Bethnal Green Road E2 7DG, Wed 10 July 2013, 11.30am to 10.30pm, free. To arrange entry, check the website then email firstname.lastname@example.org, stating your preferred sessions.
* The picture shows Bethnal Green Road near the venue. Spot any superheroes?
* Emboldened underscored words in most cases indicate a hyperlink, a reader service rare among websites. If a link does not work, it is probably because the site to which the URL refers has not been maintained.