* Update 010915: Elijah Wood’s DJ sidekick turned up in good time, the Hollywood actor a good two hours later. First, of course, the poor love had to sit down to dinner, the crowd to wait. Slebs, eh?
SOME PEOPLE still wonder what celebrities are for. The answer of course is: the amusement of everyone else but above all for advertising.
A perfect illustration is the English footballer who placed an ad this month for a personal assistant: to work for him 24/7 for less than he earns in a week.
The 31-year-old gave us all a good laugh, along with revealing his desire to be a world brand like David Beckham.
Now a Hackney bar-restaurant has persuaded Elijah Wood to plug his fame into its drive for more customers.
Be kind to the guy. He’s been hawking his DJ outfit, Wooden Wisdom, all over America for a while and now it’s our turn to let him play his favourite vinyl.
Yes, old-skool. The pub has “a world-class, rich-bodied, analogue sound system, featuring towering Tannoy Westminster GR loudspeakers , specially modified turntables, valve amplification and a rare Bozak mixer”. Their words, incidentally.
As for Wood’s role on the night, perhaps being a world-famous actor is not enough and he also wants to be a global brand. Like, say, David Guetta.
Hamish Scott 280815
* Merchants Tavern, 36 Charlotte Road, Shoreditch EC2A 3PG (020 7060 5335), Tuesday 1 September 2015. What time? When he’s ready: he’s a sleb.
* Main picture: when you leave Shoreditch station, you’re not far from the chance to see a superstar on the decks
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